after Mid-Years.

Mid Years weren't that great.

Hoping for the best nonetheless. I'm like that.

I was looking through my past blog posts just now, as I was searching for something.. Didn't find it on my blog. But that isn't the point here.

I realised that I was really motivated (or at least that's how it appeared to me) during O levels. Many of my posts revolved around studying for Os and stuff like that. However, for some reason, I have lost it now. All that discipline and motivation just vanished. I guess I am just very extremely distracted by the things around me now, what with Candy Crush, Facebook, YouTube, WhatsApp, and so on. I have to find some way to keep all these distractions aside and prioritise my time well. I haven't got much time left for A Levels.. something like 3 to 4 more months. I don't feel that preparedness that I experienced at secondary 4. Is it really just me or everyone also feels that way? I tried doing some self-reflection on my own (yes I'm introspective), and found out that many things have changed about me over the years. I have gotten used to procrastinating about work, leaving things only till the very last minute. I have become really slack (like seriously) and giving myself lots of excuses about doing work. Once in a while, I wonder what would have happened if I went to Poly or actually got into TJC. Maybe things would have turned out differently. Too many 'maybe's to consider which I would not want to delve into. Nevertheless, I've got to face reality. I am in MJC and my A levels would be coming up in a few months' time. I've probably said this countless times but I really need to start working hard, working smart, stop slacking & procrastinating.

While sorting through old notes and stuff to pass to Sing Hui (a junior), I was amazed by how hardworking I was in secondary four. I made notes rather consistently and did my exam papers and practice papers regularly. In contrast, I have tons of overdued work such as exam papers and stuff to complete now. I barely made notes in JC 1, so now I have also started making notes for my various subjects. Hopefully all these little efforts are going to pay off. I am really hoping to see an improvement in my grades for all my subjects. And if I don't, I have to seriously reflect on why I didn't. I am not expecting a huge jump in my grades. I just don't want to see my grades fall lower and lower. It just sucks you know, especially when the big day is not so far away now..

I need to strike a balance between work and play. I found myself playing too much in JC. Not literally playing though. I watch too much TV probably, and go out too often. Friends and family members always tell me that I am working too hard. But they don't really know me. Truth is, half the time I am probably WhatsApping, Facebooking and the other half is spent on studying. I am planning to deactivate my Facebook account really soon. Probably today is a good day to do so. Shall think about that later. But the point is, I need to have this 'reward for work, work for reward' mentality (just like the SG govt haha). If I don't, I'm sure to just fall deeper. I know this sounds a little extreme, but I guess it is probably the only way to discipline myself.

I need to set targets as well.. And probably being overly-ambitious might help. I'm not too sure. But it'll definitely help to motivate me. I don't want to disappoint myself, my teachers, my family and friends.

Lastly, I need to stop being influenced by my environment. By that, I mean friends (and family to a small extent). I cannot have the 'people slack so I should also slack as well' attitude. It's going to kill me.

Instead of "I should/shouldn't have..", I need to go for "I am.." (if you get what I mean).


As you can read above, I have been doing quite a lot of thinking over the past few months.


I am a very hopeful person. And yes I know, actions speak louder than words.



Hope to blog again soon. (: