Dear blog,

Sorry for neglecting you all this time.

I've been busy. As always. I'm never not busy. Oh well. I guess that's how my life works.

Soooo, I'm supposed to be studying now actually but I wanted to look for an outlet to just relax. I already browsed through my Facebook and checked my Whatsapp notifications, so I've decided to come back here to blog. About what?

Actually I have no idea. Haha. But the act of typing on the keyboard to write something in my little diary feels great.

Probably I'll drop a few updates on my life then.

So jie has flown back to Australia as school has started. I'm already missing her. :/

And my recess week just ended last week. I'm currently in the 2nd half of my Semester 2, which means that finals are coming in about a month. So, how have I been doing academically in uni apart from my participation in other non-academic stuff? Well, not really good. Whenever I hear people muttering the word 'GPA', I can't help but feel depressed and I generally try to avoid being part of that conversation. I hear people saying how their 4.x GPA is not good enough, and I have humble friends around me who actually scored a GPA of 5.0 which is like perfect. Generally I think most people had a pretty good start to their first semester but not me. Mine was way below expectations, and way below average I think. I would have to work so much harder than others in order to be on average, or above it. Not just because I'm less intellectually inclined than them, but because my score is much lower than theirs. It's a rather sucky feeling to know that you're really not there. I think my mindset of "taking courage in numbers" has to go away. I should succumb less to peer pressure as well. I think because most of my friends are actually closet muggers, either that or they are just really intelligent and can understand concepts rather easily without much effort (unlike the slow me), they may not seem to put in much effort or give a heck about their studies but end up scoring pretty well. Or maybe luck is just not on my side. Either way, I should stop comparing myself to others and really just work on improving myself. And instead of just suffering in silence, I need to start asking more questions - to friends and to profs. And also to pay attention in lesson, like really keeping my mind awake and alert instead of just stoning or passively sitting there. All of these things that I wrote above are some stuff that I've been working on in the 1st half of Sem 2, so I hope that by keeping this up and of course continual effort, I will excel and be on par with the rest by the end of the year. I'm not asking for stellar results, but at least hoping for a 4.x to speak of. I need to also be less easily distracted, and sleep and rest sufficiently so that information goes into my brain more easily.

Anyway, I will be moving out of hall by the end of the month. This may sound sudden to everyone. Yeah, I'm moving out before the semester ends. Because I don't see myself sustaining well living in hall. I don't know what's the reason for that. But I really, really miss home, maybe the company or the environment (or both) is what draws me back. It's an indescribable feeling of excitement and anticipation that I got when I finally decided on withdrawing from hall. It's not an impulsive decision, but something that I had been thinking about since last month or so. And the travelling, if you're wondering? I really don't mind travelling that far because unlike most people, travelling allows me to unwind and it's in fact something I enjoy doing. The cost? I did my math and found out that staying in hall would cost me a startling $180 more per month, than if I bought train concession or took the free NTU shuttle bus. So I would be making a saving which feels really good because one thing that kept bothering since I entered uni was that I just kept spending and spending. Which is also why I took up some part-time jobs and doing paid surveys etc whenever I could. And being at home? Yeah I get to see my family and be in my most familiar environment where I grew up for the past 19 years of my life (although not everyone will be at home). I can also stop feeling bad for treating my house like a hotel, where I check in on Friday nights and leave on Monday mornings. I am really looking forward to going back home to stay.

So, question: will I be staying in hall next semester? Well, since I do have some points which might enable me to continue staying next sem, I haven't really decided. I shall use this opportunity as well to come up with a decision as to whether all this travelling is sustainable and tolerable to me (though I believe it would turn out fine).

On a random note, Daddy's birthday is coming in a few days' time! :)

Yup, so that's about all the major stuff that's been going through my head lately other than more equations, formulas and concepts.

Hopefully everyone is doing fine too!

Bye! :D