So yeap, I haven't been blogging recently coz of my hectic school life yeah..
JC life is really tough, and the curriculum is pretty much different from secondary school. Some things I wanna blog about:
1) I end school at 5pm on Mondays, Tuesdays, Thursdays. Wednesdays and Fridays are my CCA days, so I practically end school at 6pm plus.
2) Following up from my previous post, I have definitely made new friends in 12S209. Some of the people there are friendly and nice to me, and we get along well. However, in my honest opinion, I cannot get used to being in this class up till this day. First of all, as I think I've mentioned in my previous post, I appealed at the very last minute into 12S209, which is the class for DSA students and appeal students etc. So basically, the grades of the students in this class are not really like those in 4E8. In fact, the environment is rather opposite. The class consists of 2 times as many males as females (16 guys, 7 girls); it is definitely not the best class in the cohort; there is rarely competition amongst students; many students are unmotivated with pretty bad attitude. In all, I am not used to being in such an environment. I am not sure if this could be the reason, or part of the reason, why I am not performing well in MJC. This class is also not a really bonded class - the guys form their own cliques, about 2 to 3 different cliques, and the girls generally form an entire clique by themselves. There isn't much interaction between the two genders, something which many JC classes are usually able to establish. Truthfully, I find myself out of place in this class. Sometimes, I really hope that I hadn't appealed at the last minute (as in appealed during the given period) or not appealed at all (or possibly rejected by my appeal). Oh well, that's life right.. You don't always get what you want, and whatever's done cannot be undone. Instead of regretting the decisions I hadn't made, why not focus on what I can do now to improve and move on...
3) PW has officially kicked in. Submitted my PI last week, and I have gotten my groupings. My groupmates are: Jia Wen, Kevin, Galvin, Ryan. Hope that PW will be smooth-sailing and successful with my group mates, although I don't really know most of them well now. I do have some thoughts and feelings about my groupmates, but I shan't comment too much here.. Anyway, I am definitely aiming for an A for PW. :)
4) Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that I went to run for Photog Exco. And once again, I didn't get in.. I think I have a problem with my popularity or something. Probably I look really unfriendly/hostile/nerdy/scary to those who are new to me. Truth is, I am not (most of the time). I wanted to run for Exco to take up a leadership position, which I failed to in PRSS Choir. And by some self-reflection, I felt that taking up a position in my CCA might help me to manage my time better. I know it sounds contradicting.. I was thinking that the 4 years I had spent in PRSS Choir actually made me a better time manager as I didn't really have a lot of time left for myself after CCAs, what with SYF and all. And I never had the opportunity of taking up a CCA leadership position, which is rather disappointing.. So that's why I thought of joining Exco. But oh well, it's okay I guess.. Looking forward to the new Exco leaders who will be leading us! (:
5) If you had read my post above, you would have seen me mentioning about my sucky grades. Okay, other than acing one of my Maths test and doing slightly better in GP and Chinese, as well as a little for Chemistry, I don't think of myself performing up to par. It's really something I feel that I can do better. But part of the problem lies within myself. I get distracted easily and succumb to temptations (e.g. Facebook, games) and lose track of time. I have been sleeping real late too, around 12am + every night, and my health suffers as a result. It really sucks to be me sometimes. I really want to exercise self-discipline on myself, but the mind is willing, the flesh is weak. Argh :/ When I was young, I never had this problem. I could sit at my desk and do my homework for hours continuously and get my homework done efficiently and accurately. But nowadays, I spend like oh-so-freaking long trying to get a damn question or tutorial done. I am not able to absorb things and understand concepts as fast as I used to, which explains why I take eternity to complete my tasks. That could also be due to my lack of sleep. I complain and do things that are irrelevant to my studies. I may be physically present and awake during lectures, but mentally, I am somewhere else, evaluating people I see or doing things like that. I try to attempt my tutorials on my own, without referring to my friends' answers, but to no avail. When we have long weekends or public holidays, I tend to spend it all away. And you know what? I don't even know where the heck I spend all my time on. I would have to chiong all my homework at the very last minute. Every Sunday, I constantly remind myself to sleep early after I have had my fair share of entertainment (e.g. watching TV). But I have failed myself again and again. And I become short-sighted. When there is no homework that needs to be completed the next day, I get complacent and start to slack for the night, only to realise that all my time has been wasted and should have been spent on completing assignments due the day after, and I really hate myself sometimes. All this boils down to my time management and self-discipline, and I seem to have lost control of the both of them. I need a way to get back on my feet and catch up with the rest of the cohort (I would not compare myself with the class). I must find a solution.
6) I really miss being in PRSS. The enjoyable times that I've had with 4E8, the friends that I used to see everyday, the awesome teachers that we had, were no longer a daily sight. I wouldn't say that I remember all the times that I've spent in PRSS, but I hold on to the memories that I can recall, and forever hoping to go back to those times.. Nostalgic, really. I really don't know why. I never knew that life in PRSS could be so memorable and something that I would miss so dearly. Just being at PRSS or in the vicinity of Tampines - the MRT station, Tampines Mall, Century Square, Tampines One etc, just reminds me of the times I've had as a Pasirian and it really feels like home. I guess that these are the things that I'll never forget as a Pasirian, and this makes me wonder if I'll ever feel that same way about MJC too...
So I guess this post has finally come to an end. It really feels good when you've finally let it all out, huh? :) Before I end off, just a little something for everyone:
Thanks so much for reading my rather long post of rants, mainly. Haha. :D
Bye! :)
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